About a week and a half ago, I was in a hard place. Like, most dancers feel at many parts of their career, I was beginning to doubt myself, my talent, my purpose, the path I had chosen. Still having not fully healed from the ankle sprain and being too anxious to sit around my house until it heals, I found myself rehearsing for new companies I have decided to join, going to auditions everyday, taking classes, walking around the city and doing just about everything else I shouldn't be doing with an injury. If you are a dancer, then you understand how hard it is to just let an injury heal. It's like telling a chef that he’s not allowed to cook and has to order take out for a few months. It's PAINFULLY terrible. This week was especially difficult because, not being at my full potential, I went to 4 auditions, made it to the final round and got cut. Two of them being in one day. That's when it really crushed me. I went home and sulked, which I never do. I seriously started considering moving back to Los Angeles. No one could console me, but my best friend since childhood, Brandon Alexander. He reminded me that I’ve already traveled to 3 different continents to perform. That I'm living in a city that most people only dream of living in and, as hard as it is, I'm going after my dream and still making it work. I have already gotten where most people have been to scared to go and I'm making strides. That I was injured and I was still making it to the final rounds. That I was crying because I wasn't a success overnight and that he "wasn't going to coddle me ." He reminded me that if I've gotten this far, it only has to get better from here. Besides, I became a dancer for the journey, not the destination. It was exactly what I needed to hear. My spirit was lifted and everything immediately began to change.
The next morning, I received an email from an audition that I went to the previous day offering me the position of a dancer in a web series. Through this opportunity, I am receiving my first SAG voucher and I got to work with some amazing talents. Later that day, I went on my second ever task with my new side gig, TaskRabbit. It was a very simple task and I met a wonderful lady by the name Elizabeth, but she prefers to be called Lizzy. She was very sweet and as I was about to leave, she asked if I had a card so that if she needed anymore work done, she could contact me. I only had my personal business card on me so I gave it to her. She loved it and asked if I model as well. I told her I was always interested in commercial modeling, but never really knew how to get into the industry. To my excitement, she shares with me that she is a commercial modeling agent! (I'm sure by this point, you know where this is going) To make a potentially longer story short, I am now a signed commercial modeling with MMG.
This entire experience has proven to me that I am on the right path. That I just need to give my dreams time to catch up to me. They may not get here when I want them to, but they will get here. I need to stop losing sight of the fact that I am better than my insecurities may lead me to believe. My big break could always be right around the corner, but if I give up to early, I'll never know. My life as a full-time artist has definitely had a rocky start, but I will be fine. I just have to stay the course, weather the storm and hold on to the dreams I have laid out for myself. Jason Mraz once said "Leap and the net will appear". I couldn't agree more.